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Saturday, June 6, 2009


This is our new family photo that we had made a couple of weeks ago! There is also the picture of Mr. Goodbar and me, I realized that is the first photo we have had taken since we got married in 2004! That got me thinking…..

I’m sure that after this post I will have some people that have some harsh things to say to me and some major disagreements with me, that is okay. I want to hear all you have to say!

Now for the thinking part….I realized that we called the picture of the three of us our “Family Photo” but then I realized that our “Family Photo” was just as complete with any photo of Mr. Goodbar and me before we had Junior Mint.

Now, let me explain. We believe that God created the husband and wife relationship to be a family. To us, that means that the family is complete when we got married, any children that we are blessed with are additions to our family.

Don’t get me wrong, Junior Mint is such a big part of our family and our family NOW wouldn’t be complete without him. But God completed the family with the union of husband and wife. I think far too many people forget this.

The most important relationship in a person’s life is that between you and God, after that comes the husband/wife relationship, THEN the child/parent relationship. Only when the husband/wife relationship is okay, can the parent/child relationship be okay.

When a child is put in a place where they are the center of the family, that is exactly what they become, the center! They come to believe they control the family. By this I mean, that they start to control what gets done and when. The child’s schedule will adapt to fit yours, not the other way around. We, as adults, have to continue living in the world while we raise our children, therefore they have to adapt to our schedules! (Of course…using God given parental wisdom to create a workable schedule for parents and children)

I understand the randomness of this….however; I look around and realize that there are so many families that are “child-centered” families! What happens to the parents? What happens to that preciousness of that relationship? What happens to the structure set forth by God? What happens when the child is all grown up and leaves, what is left?


Makia said...

I couldn't have said it better myself except to add....

It bothers me SOOOO bad when the families around us who have a problem with the way we raise our children act like WE are doing something wrong because we are trying to teach our children that it isn't ALL about them. I had a situation last night where I had a relative say "I can't believe ya'll" speaking to Matt and I, because we wouldn't let our kids get their way. It was a very simple issue BUT WE AS PARENTS had said no. This same relative is one that will let her child get away with almost anything and THEN try to discipline and when it doesn't work she wonders why. DUH! All the while her and husband are having problems because she always puts her kids first. Then she points fingers at ME when I put my husband before my kids. DON'T tell me how to do my wifely and parental duties when its MY family that is working NOT yours! about praying for them as they are very close relatives and seem to have a few things backwards.

blueviolet said...

Hi! I'm following from the MBC followers club!